Every few weeks I check in with my folks on Facebook and twitter to see what resources they’re looking for. Based on last week’s responses I’ve got some good info to share.
First up, from Lily:
“How to help educate parents about normal [as if there is a normal, using it for lack of a better word] for childhood sexuality so they don’t just automatically assume any sexuality children exhibit always indicates foul play. As a clinician, this is tricky especially as you must always rule out any sex abuse/trauma/foul play, but once that is completely ruled out, what are great resources that lay out developmental stages of sexuality for children and adolescents to show parents. Thanks!”
Thank you Lily for such a great question! My go-to web referral for all things developmental and age-appropriate is Stop It Now. Check out their concise list of common vs uncommon sexual behaviors in each developmental stage. As parents, we need to know what is typical for each age group. I love this site because it is not gender biased nor slut shamey.
Here’s your link, Lily: http://www.stopitnow.org/age_appropriate_sexual_behavior
Next resource request comes from Nadine:
“Sex poz resources with kids and teens of colour/Indigenous kids. Also: pre/teen appropriate pieces that examine race and sexuality.”
Thank you Nadine! Sex positivity is not a one size fits all idea, as sexual health information needs to resonate with the individual. I don’t buy into color-blind nonsense or any of that post-racial bullshit. My preferred version of sex ed is intersectional! I am always happy to inform people about the Native Youth Sexual health Network. They do ALL the things. It’s sex-positive, youth led, intersectional, Indigenous-centered sexual health information.
Here’s your link Nadine: http://www.nativeyouthsexualhealth.com/index.html
And finally, this last request came in a private message:
“My daughter is identifying as asexual. A friend of hers identifies as queer. Through her, I am hearing all kinds of terms that make up the rainbow, and I am getting downright confused! I was hoping for a primer? Gay, lesbian, transexual and bisexual all make sense to me. But there are some others that are less straight forward. What might be some information or resources for sharing with these kids to help them navigate their worlds more safely?”
This is a question I hear more and more from parents, especially those outside the Bay Area Bubble! My first instinct is to refer parents to Tumblr so you can search through the various labels. Really, this is where young people are figuring their sexual identities out in real time. You can learn a lot by following the tags in Tumblr. So I’ve got a bit of a homework assignment for the parents who are feeling out of the loop.
First, check out this list of terms related to both the LGBTQIA community as well as general social justice terms from the UC Davis LGB Center: http://lgbcenter.ucdavis.edu/lgbt-education/lgbtqia-glossary THEN I want you to go to Tumblr and search for those terms. Do some poking around. Maybe report back in the comments if you feel so inclined!
As always I hope these links serve you well. Thanks for reading and being the bad ass parents and parent allies you are!