Nic came to visit the Bay this week. It’s been a few months since we’ve seen each other. Last time I flew down to LA to spend a few days with her and her son. This time, she spent the afternoon with me and my sons. As we walked the lake, Nic told me a story:

Recently she did a relay marathon type thingy where she and a partner ran for 4 days as a fundraiser. Her partner was an older woman, an Auntie from her childhood. The women is in her late 60’s and sees a lot of herself in Nic. And as the women chatted and shared more intimate details of their lives. The Auntie felt the need to kick some serious knowledge: “Let me tell you, there are only 3 things women like you and me really want from life…”

Nic perked up, listened hard and waited for the wisdom of been there, done that, started the newsletter…

“…All we really want is to eat, fuck and travel.”

Nic’s jaw dropped.

Aunite continued, “Men will come into your life and all they want from you is babies, housekeeping and cuddling. When what you really want is a co-conspirator, a lover, an equal.”

Nic waited for more, blinking her big eyes, waiting to absorb more wisdom, but none came. So she had to ask, “So what’s the solution?”

The Auntie replied, “you’ve met my ex-husbands. I’m still looking.”

Eat. Fuck. Travel.

It’s hard to describe how hard that hit both of us. I remember saying something like, “Holy fucking Hell, have you ever heard another woman say that to you? out loud? on purpose even?”

We felt all giggly and excited and kinda breathless. It is exactly what we want, and even more importantly, we believe we are capable of doing as mothers. It feels good to hear it from an elder…

Eat. Fuck. Travel.